How to support others during the COVID-19 pandemic

Supporting friends and family

One of the best things you can do for your friends and family is simply to reach out. Call, text, and email the people you love, and invite them to talk openly about the fears and day-to-day challenges they’re experiencing. Make a special effort to connect with anyone in your community who may be particularly vulnerable, perhaps because they live alone, they’re at higher risk from this disease, or they struggle with a mental health challenge. Talking about hardship can be uncomfortable, but just acknowledging that someone is struggling truly does help.

You can also support your loved ones in setting healthy boundaries around their exposure to the news. Let friends and family know that while you want them to be informed, you also understand that 24/7 coverage of the pandemic can take a mental toll, and you’re always happy to talk about something else. If you notice that someone is overwhelmed with conflicting or speculative information, you can suggest a reliable news source such as the World Health Organization or recommend focusing on local news sources to stay informed of events and opportunities in their immediate community.

Resources for supporting friends and family:

• The Elephant in the Room: Talking About Loss and Hardship with Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant (Option B): Simple advice that can help you start a conversation with someone who may be struggling right now.
• How to Support Your Loved One with Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant (Option B): Learn how to be there for people you care about by following the “Platinum Rule of Friendship”—treat others as they want to be treated.
• How to Talk to a Loved One About Hardship—and Why It Matters (Option B): Tips for starting, and continuing, an open conversation with a loved one who’s navigating hardship.
• How to Support a Loved One Going Through a Tough Time During COVID-19 (Mental Health First Aid USA): Practical guidance from experts on how to support loved ones dealing with mental health challenges during the pandemic.
• How Can We Look After Older People When Coronavirus Has Made It Impossible to See Them? (Quartz): Suggestions for staying connected and supporting elderly friends and relatives when in-person contact isn’t an option.
• COVID-19 Mythbusters (World Health Organization): Facts and explanations aimed at countering common misconceptions about the coronavirus.
• Five Ways to View Coverage of the Coronavirus (American Psychological Association): Advice for staying informed without becoming overwhelmed.
• Want to Help Others Avoid COVID-19? Don’t Share Misinformation! (News Literacy Project): A good explanation of how and why false rumors spread, along with tips for verifying sources and finding credible information.

Supporting parents of school-aged kids

With schools closed and many adults either out of work or working from home, this is an especially chaotic time for families, and in particular for parents. While you may not be able to help out in person, you can offer to occupy kids with a phone or video call while their parents take care of other responsibilities.

You can also help curate resources for kids who are out of school. Dig into sources like Khan Academy’s suggested homeschooling schedules, Common Sense Media’s curated games and videos for families, and general parenting and education sites like PBS Kids for Parents—and send links to specific activities so overwhelmed parents don’t have to spend time searching for the best-fit content.

Finally, remember to express support for the full range of choices parents might make about what’s best for their kids right now. Some parents will opt out of homeschooling, relax screen time restrictions, or make other adjustments to expectations and routines; you can help just by letting them know you respect those decisions.

Resources for supporting parents of school-aged kids:

• How Working Parents Can Prepare for Coronavirus Closures (Harvard Business Review): Tips for parents on setting expectations with managers, kids, and parenting partner(s).
• How Can Khan Academy Be Used for Remote Learning During School Closures? (Khan Academy): Homeschooling schedules, activities, and resources for kids aged four to eighteen.
• TEDEd Lessons (TEDEd): Rich collection of video lessons for elementary through high school students.
• Help Your Child Learn and Grow (PBS Kids for Parents): Tips and activities for teaching literacy, math, science, art, and life skills to younger kids (ages two to eight).
• I Homeschool My Kids. Here Are 6 Ideas for Parents While Schools Are Closed. (WBUR): Advice for homeschooling during this chaotic time, including prioritizing family activities and unstructured play.
• I Refuse to Run a Coronavirus Home School (New York Times): Homeschooling might not be what’s best for some families right now—and that’s fine.

Supporting kids

Just as this situation is challenging for parents, it’s scary and confusing for kids. If you’re a parent or caregiver, you may be looking for ways to support younger children who are upset by school closures or missed time with friends, or who are anxious about what the pandemic means for their families.

Simple steps can go a long way toward helping kids feel safe. Limit their exposure to the news, and be thoughtful about when and how you discuss the situation and your own feelings. Give them extra hugs and affection, and tell them you love them.

If you aren’t sure what a child needs, start by asking questions and listening. Find out what they already know about the virus and its impact, and correct misinformation with age-appropriate facts. Assure them that the adults in their lives are working hard to keep everyone healthy. Finally, help them feel in control by explaining the concrete steps they can take to protect themselves and others, such as washing their hands, covering coughs, and practicing physical distancing.

Video and phone calls can also be great resources for kids who are feeling lonely. Arrange virtual play dates with friends and family members, and equip younger kids with conversation starters and mental games (like Twenty Questions) to make these interactions as fun and natural as possible.

Resources for supporting kids:

• Parenting in the Time of COVID-19 (World Health Organization): These six one-page tips for parents cover planning one-on-one time, staying positive, creating a daily routine, avoiding bad behavior, managing stress, and talking about COVID-19.
• How to Talk to Your Kids About Coronavirus (PBS Kids for Parents): Advice on reassuring anxious kids, arming them with accurate, age-appropriate information, and empowering them to protect themselves and your community.
• 29 Fun Questions for Your Next Family Dinner (Red Tricycle): Pick one of these questions to engage kids at the dinner table or spark conversation on a video call.
• Ways to Donate (Blessings in a Backpack): This organization provides weekend meals for kids who receive free school lunches.

Supporting someone who’s lost a loved one to COVID-19

As the coronavirus continues to spread, the experience of losing a loved one to this disease—or knowing someone who has—is sadly becoming more common. If you have a friend or family member who is grieving a recent loss, the first and most important thing you can do is to reach out and let them know you’ll be there for them no matter what. Instead of just offering to “do anything” or “talk anytime,” take a specific action to help them cope, such as ordering their groceries or texting them daily even if they don’t always respond.

When offering support, be aware that this is a unique and extremely difficult time to be grieving. Because the pandemic has impacted almost everyone in some way, people who are dealing with a specific loss might feel that their grief is getting buried in the larger narrative. You can honor their personal experience by asking questions about their loved one, what they’re thinking and feeling, and how you can help. Don’t assume that you know what they’re going through, or that the coping strategies someone else has used will work for them. Instead, tell them you trust them and will support them in doing whatever feels right.

Physical distancing has also made grieving harder, as the pain of losing a loved one is compounded by being unable to gather with relatives or plan an in-person funeral. While there’s no way to replace those traditions, you can help your friend or family member arrange a virtual memorial or another remote tribute. Even something simple and informal, such as gathering a group to share stories and photos on a video call, can be meaningful and healing right now. You can also encourage them to journal or write letters to their loved one, which may help them process their grief.

Resources for supporting someone who’s lost a loved one:

• Joe Primo on Supporting Grieving Children (Option B): The CEO of Good Grief—and a former hospice chaplain—shares strategies to help children cope with the death of a loved one and make sense of tragedy.
• Being There: What to Say and Do in the Aftermath of Loss (Option B): This guide provides specific ways to help a grieving friend based on insights from members of the Dinner Party, a community focused on life after loss.
• Julia Samuel on Changing How We Think About Grief (Option B): The UK’s leading grief expert discusses why we fear grief and pain—and shares ideas for how we can talk about them more openly.
• COVID-19 Resources and Updates (Good Grief): Resources and support for children, families, students, and communities navigating new life circumstances.
• Ways to Support Someone Who Is Grieving (Harvard Health Publishing): Specific suggestions for talking about grief and taking concrete steps to help.
• How to Help a Grieving Friend (Refuge in Grief): Dos and don’ts presented in a simple infographic format.
• Alternative Mourning Rituals Offer Comfort and Closure During an Outbreak (NPR): Lessons from the Ebola epidemic that may help people grieving loved ones during COVID-19.
• Grief and Fear After a COVID-19 Death: Managing a Double Trauma (CNN): Tips on staying connected and honoring a loved one’s life when you can’t hold an in-person memorial.
• How to Cope with Bereavement During the COVID-19 Pandemic (Psychology Today): Recommended coping strategies, including practicing self-compassion and alternating between “loss” and “restorative” activities.
• Grief and COVID-19: Saying Goodbye in the Age of Physical Distancing (American Psychological Association): Insights from psychology that help to explain why grieving is so hard right now.
• COVID-19 Bereavement: Advice If You Are Caring for Someone Bereaved (Sudden): Specific tips for being there for someone via phone, video call, or text messaging, along with signs that they may need professional support.

Supporting people who are financially insecure

Many people have lost jobs and health insurance as a result of this crisis, and those who were already without adequate food, housing, or health care are now at even higher risk. Low-income children are especially vulnerable, since school closures have disrupted free lunch programs and other services. If you have the means to give financially at this time, consider donating to your local food bank or to a nonprofit (such as United Way) that’s helping lower-income people cover rent payments and other basic needs. Some of these organizations may also have physically distanced volunteer opportunities; call or check their websites for details.

If someone you’re close to has lost a job, reach out to let them know you’re committed to being there for them in any way you can. Many people also anchor their identities in their work and income, so this is the time to emphasize to your loved one that they’re cherished and valuable no matter what. Remind them of their core strengths, and highlight the small things they do each day to contribute to their family and community. If they are experiencing severe financial hardship and struggling to meet basic needs, you can direct them to resources like United Way’s 211 helpline for information on government programs, discounted services, and nonprofit initiatives that may be able to help.

Resources for supporting people who are financially insecure:

• Find Your Local Food Bank (Feeding America): Connect with your community food bank through this nationwide network.
• Join the Response to COVID-19: Donate to Your Local United Way’s Efforts (United Way): This fund helps low-income families with the cost of food, housing, utilities, health-care resources, and more.
• Meals on Wheels COVID-19 Response Fund (Meals on Wheels): “The costs and efforts needed to protect seniors from COVID-19 require additional emergency funds, and that is why we are asking federal lawmakers, corporations, foundations and the general public to remember these vulnerable seniors in our national response.”
• Here’s How You Can Help People Who’ve Lost Jobs or Housing in the Wake of Coronavirus (Vox): Tips and resources for helping vulnerable service workers, supporting people struggling with food, health-care, and housing costs, combating xenophobia, and more.
• How to Comfort Someone Who Just Lost a Job (Next Avenue): Advice on what to say and do if someone close to you has been laid off.
• How to Cope with Financial Stress and Anxiety During the Coronavirus Pandemic (CNBC): Eight simple steps to suggest to anyone who is worried about their finances.
• Where Can I Find Emergency Financial Resources to Help with COVID-19 Hardships? (GrantSpace): List of individual assistance grants available to people who are facing financial hardships due to the coronavirus pandemic.
• COVID-19 Resources (211/United Way): Information on government assistance programs, discounted services, and mental health resources.
• A Guide to Helping and Getting Help During the Coronavirus Crisis (CNN): Index of resources for seeking and providing assistance with food costs, health care, housing, and more.

Supporting people who are experiencing domestic violence

With shelter-in-place orders limiting movement and interactions outside our homes, anyone experiencing domestic violence is at extremely high risk right now. Many people are suffering physical and emotional abuse for the first time, while others are seeing ongoing abuse escalate in ways that specifically target their vulnerability in the current crisis (for example, an abusive partner cutting off access to accurate news about the pandemic, or withholding essential supplies like soap and hand sanitizer).

If you know or suspect that someone you care about is being abused by a member of their household, reach out and stay connected in any way you can. Be nonjudgmental and empower them to do whatever they need to do to stay safe. Support them in small ways, such as ordering food and essential supplies and texting or calling frequently, and establish channels and signals that they can use to contact you if the abuse escalates. You can also encourage them to contact a domestic violence hotline, or do so on their behalf—these hotlines are still operating 24/7, with trained counselors and advocates available via chat, text, email, and phone.

Resources for supporting people experiencing domestic violence:

• Staying Safe During COVID-19 (National Domestic Violence Hotline): 24/7 support via chat, text, email, and phone, plus resources to help you protect yourself and your loved ones.
• Ways to Help Children and Adults Living with Violence (Futures Without Violence): Suggestions for helping loved ones cope with abuse when you can’t be physically present with them.
• The Coronavirus Could Cause a Child Abuse Epidemic (New York Times): Recommendations for protecting children and families from violence during the pandemic.
• Bystander Intervention During a Lockdown (World Pulse): How to be there for someone who is experiencing domestic violence even when you can’t be there in person.
• COVID-19 Resources for DV Survivors and Service Providers (Futures Without Violence) and Resources on the Response to the Coronavirus (National Network to End Domestic Violence): Two comprehensive lists of helpful links for both survivors and supporters.
• COVID-19 Mythbusters (World Health Organization): Facts and explanations aimed at countering common misconceptions about the coronavirus.
• Supporting Someone Experiencing Abuse (Washington State Coalition Against Domestic Violence): Tips for talking, listening, and staying connected when someone you care about is experiencing abuse.
• National Parent Helpline: Call this hotline to get support from a trained advocate, or share the number with a parent who is overwhelmed.

Supporting frontline workers

Physical distancing isn’t a viable option for essential service providers like doctors, nurses, first responders, grocery clerks, gas station attendants, postal workers . . . and the list goes on. These individuals are risking their own health to keep their communities safe and functioning, and they need all the support we can provide right now.

First and foremost, you can show support by taking steps to reduce the strain on frontline workers. Avoid unnecessary errands (including nonessential home deliveries) and ask your usual medical providers about rescheduling routine visits or moving them to phone or video consultations. When you do need to interact with a frontline worker, wash your hands first, give them as much space as you reasonably can, and let them know how much you appreciate their commitment to serving their community during this hard time.

If you want to take more direct action, consider sending e-cards or digital gift cards to employees at your local hospital, grocery store, retirement home, or other essential business. You can also donate to the World Health Organization’s COVID-19 Solidarity Response Fund to support efforts to provide frontline workers with essential equipment and supplies. And if you have a friend or family member on the front lines, reach out to let them know you’re available to talk, whether they need a sympathetic ear or a quick distraction.

Resources for supporting frontline workers:

• How to Support People in Health Care Working During Coronavirus (HuffPo): Simple steps you can take to ease the burden on health-care workers, including respecting their boundaries, following (and sharing) expert medical advice, and checking in to make them laugh or let them vent.
• 20 Ways to Support Nurses and Healthcare Workers on the Front Lines of COVID-19 (Nurse.org): Suggestions for advocating for health-care workers, donating money and basic supplies, and expressing gratitude to the nurses (and other health professionals) in your community.
• Donate to the WHO’s COVID-19 Solidarity Response Fund (World Health Organization): Donations go toward efforts to understand the spread of the virus, develop treatments and vaccines, improve patient care, and provide frontline workers with essential supplies.

Supporting small businesses

This is a very uncertain time for small brick-and-mortar businesses. Nonessential shops and restaurants are either closed or dramatically altering their operations, and with most people staying home, the foot traffic they rely on is almost nonexistent.

If your financial situation hasn’t changed, see if you can buy online gift cards to support the businesses you would normally visit in person. Keep gift cards to use when stores reopen, or send them to anyone in your life who could use a special pick-me-up, such as an anxious friend, frontline worker, or elderly relative or neighbor. You can also continue to pay in-person service providers, such as hairdressers and house cleaners, as though you were keeping your regular appointments. Just call and ask that they charge your credit card as usual, or mail a check and a note to their business address.

Even if you aren’t able to contribute financially, you can let your local businesses know that you care about them and that you’ll be there as soon as they reopen. Comment on their social media accounts, leave them a glowing online review, or send an email to say that you value their presence in your community and appreciate everything they’re doing to keep their staff and customers safe.

Resources for supporting small businesses:

• 5 Easy Ways to Help Support Your Favorite Local Businesses (Business Insider): Creative ideas for helping small businesses weather this crisis.
• How to Support Restaurants Without Putting Food Delivery Workers at Risk (HuffPo): Advice for maximizing benefit and minimizing physical contact when ordering food from local restaurants.