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Build your resilience

Resilience is like a muscle you can build. It’s just a matter of knowing how. Whether you’re facing adversity yourself or supporting someone else who is, these resources can help. We’re always adding to our library of materials, so check back in from time to time.

Lessons from the book

Listen to Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant share key findings from Option B about how you can build resilience.

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Fighting Permanence

One way we build resilience is by fighting permanence, which is the belief that our grief or pain will last forever. Taking steps to remind ourselves that even the most painful feelings won’t always be so intense can help us find the strength to heal.
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Finding Meaning

After loss or trauma, we all hope to bounce back. Some of us manage to bounce forward. Learn how helping others gives our suffering meaning, allowing us to grow from the most difficult experiences of our lives.
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Self-Confidence & Self-Compassion

When you treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you’d show a friend, that’s self-compassion. When you believe in your abilities, that’s self-confidence. We can practice self-compassion and develop our self-confidence on a daily basis to build resilience.
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Raising Resilient Kids

Kids are often more resilient than we think. There are concrete things we can do to help them build that resilience, including making sure they know they aren’t facing adversity alone.
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The Platinum Rule of Friendship

We’ve all heard of the Golden Rule: treat others how you want to be treated. But the way you want to be treated when facing adversity may be completely different from how others want to be treated. Use the Platinum Rule instead: treat others how they want to be treated.
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Taking Back Joy

The guilt we feel after loss or trauma can prevent us from enjoying the things we love. But when we give ourselves permission to do what we love, we allow ourselves to reclaim joy in our lives.
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The Elephant in the Room: Talking About Loss and Hardship

We often have a hard time talking about adversity—but staying silent can make our loved ones feel even more isolated after loss or hardship. This video offers simple ways to speak with empathy and honesty when our friends are suffering.
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The Importance of Resilience

Resilience is the strength and speed of our response to adversity. It’s a skillset we develop over the course of our lives, and there are concrete steps we can take to build resilience long before we face any kind of difficulty.

Conversations with experts

Read Q&As with experts on how to build resilience in yourself, your family, and your community.

Abuse & Sexual Assault

Michelle Palmer on Regaining Hope After Sexual Assault

The executive director of the Wendt Center for Loss and Healing talks about how survivors of sexual assault have coped and regained hope after trauma.

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Divorce & Family Challenges

Tamara Afifi on Building Resilient Families

A professor at the University of California, Santa Barbara, and an expert on family communication discusses how families can find opportunity in adversity.

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Raising Resilient Kids

Julie Lythcott-Haims on Raising Resilient Kids

A former Stanford dean—and a parent herself—shares why failure is an important part of growing into a successful adult.

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Hate & Violence

Jack Saul on Overcoming Trauma

A leading trauma expert and clinical psychologist explains why talking about trauma helps the healing process.

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Health, Illness & Injury

Dr. Adrienne Boissy on Showing Empathy

The Cleveland Clinic's chief experience officer shares what she's learned from her patients about the power of empathy and acceptance.

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Grief & Loss

Chris Davis on Making Sense of Loss

A psychology professor has made it his goal to understand how people respond to illness and death. He shares ways that we can help ourselves, our friends, and our families grieve.

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Expert talks and advice

Check out these recommendations and insights on how to face adversity in your life.

Resilience

A Guide to Grounded Hope

Writer and counseling psychologist Lee Daniel Kravetz describes five steps we can take to find realistic hope in the face of adversity.

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Grief & Loss

Being There: What to Say and Do in the Aftermath of Loss

This guide provides specific ways to help a grieving friend based on insights from members of The Dinner Party, a community focused on life after loss.

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Divorce & Family Challenges

Principles of Parting

Author Wendy Paris shares key behaviors that help people bounce back after going through a divorce.

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Raising Resilient Kids

The 7 C’s: Building Blocks of Resilience in Kids

Pediatrician Kenneth Ginsburg identifies the qualities that help kids build strength and provides advice for parents to cultivate resilience.

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Resilience

How to Make Stress Your Friend

Psychologist Kelly McGonigal outlines how we can build resilience by connecting with and caring for other people during times of stress.

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Grief & Loss

Beyond Closure

Grief expert Nancy Berns explains why we don't need closure to heal from loss. Rather, we can find freedom by carrying our joy and our grief together.

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Incarceration

How I Went From Federal Prison to Capitol Hill

Lawyer Christopher Poulos describes how sharing about his past and refusing to take no for an answer helped him succeed after being incarcerated.

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Health, Illness & Injury

Seeing and Being Seen: A Call for Healing

Dr. Adrienne Boissy encourages us to build meaningful connections and develop empathy to help ourselves—and others—heal.

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Divorce & Family Challenges

Breakups Don't Have to Leave You Broken

Psychologist Gary Lewandowski shares how activities that help you rediscover yourself can also help you recover from divorce.

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Abuse & Sexual Assault

From Victim to Survivor

Advocate and sexual abuse survivor Lauren Book encourages us to dig into our pain to regain power and create change.

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Health, Illness & Injury

My Philosophy for a Happy Life

Student Sam Berns shares his four secrets to living a happy life, including focusing on what he can do rather than on what he can’t.

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Health, Illness & Injury

Our Fight for Disability Rights and Why We're Not Done Yet

Activist Judith Heumann explains steps we can take toward a more inclusive world for people with disabilities.

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Raising Resilient Kids

Factors of Resilience in Children

Resilience expert Ann Masten shares the factors that prepare kids to be resilient when faced with adversity.

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Incarceration

We Need to Talk About an Injustice

Human rights lawyer Bryan Stevenson emphasizes the importance of humanity and compassion in creating a just society.

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Raising Resilient Kids

The Power of Believing that You Can Improve

Developmental psychologist Carol Dweck explains how kids who embrace effort and difficulty learn to take on challenges with a growth mindset.

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Abuse & Sexual Assault

How We Talk About Sexual Assault Online

Writer and activist Ione Wells describes how we can use personal stories and social media to reduce isolation around sexual assault and drive social justice.

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Hate & Violence

How the Worst Moments in Our Lives Make Us Who We Are

Writer and psychologist Andrew Solomon encourages us to forge meaning from our struggles and build a new identity that incorporates even the worst events in our lives.

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Resilience

The Surprising Science of Happiness

Social psychologist Dan Gilbert describes how our "psychological immune system" can help us find happiness when things don’t go as planned.

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Health, Illness & Injury

Yes, I Survived Cancer. But That Doesn’t Define Me.

Author Debra Jarvis explains how she claimed her experience with cancer by letting go of her old self and allowing a new self to emerge.

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Raising Resilient Kids

How to Raise Successful Kids - Without Overparenting

Former Stanford dean Julie Lythcott-Haims encourages parents to stop defining their children's success via grades and test scores and instead focus on developing self-efficacy.

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Resilience

Why We All Need to Practice Emotional First Aid

Psychologist and author Guy Winch describes how changing our responses to failure can build resilience.

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Health, Illness & Injury

What People Say When They Don’t Know What to Say

Boston Marathon bombing survivor Adrianne Haslet-Davis recommends small steps we can take to help our loved ones in the face of tragedy.

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Divorce & Family Challenges

Family Toolkit: Supporting One Another Through Divorce

Help kids find learning opportunities and make sense of separation and divorce with these videos, stories, activities, and more from Sesame Street.

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Grief & Loss

Family Toolkit: Talking About Grief

Sesame Street developed this bilingual multimedia toolkit to help families communicate openly and effectively about grief and begin healing together.

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Incarceration

Family Toolkit: Coping with a Loved One’s Incarceration

These resources from Sesame Street provide caregivers with advice for coping as a family and talking with children about the incarceration of a loved one.

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Inspiration

Explore inspirational articles and videos from across the web.

Grief & Loss

Lucy Kalanithi: What makes life worth living in the face of death

Dr. Lucy Kalanithi shares what she learned about life through her husband's illness and death—that 'being human doesn't happen despite suffering—it happens within it.'

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Health, Illness & Injury

Living Beyond Limits

World champion snowboarder Amy Purdy, who lost her legs at age 19, describes how facing an obstacle can ignite our imagination.

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Raising Resilient Kids

How to Build Resilient Kids, Even After a Loss

Sheryl Sandberg shares what she has learned about the factors that help kids persevere through adversity.

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Health, Illness & Injury

My Life with Paralysis, It’s a Workout

Harvard student Valerie Piro explains how talking honestly and openly about her daily routine allows her to take control of her life’s narrative.

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Abuse & Sexual Assault

The View From the Victim Room

After speaking out against her attacker, a survivor of domestic abuse discovers that joy can be found even in great distress.

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Grief & Loss

You May Want to Marry My Husband

A moving tribute from a woman with terminal cancer to her husband—and an earnest wish that he finds love again.

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Divorce & Family Challenges

Talking About Miscarriages

Roberta Thomson shares a powerful story about the secret grief of miscarriage in the hopes of letting others know they are not alone.

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